Tuesday, January 13, 2009

anxiety and fear

It seems that anxiety, separation to be exact, has encompassed our night love. When bedtime approaches, usually filled with laughter, reading and games, we are uplifted to a new level of connection.

Lately, after winter break to be exact, nighttime is filled with tears, fear and frustration. When bedtime approaches, filled with laughter, reading and games, a slow slithering dark curtain falls over the room. Tears begin to fall and a frightened voice pleads, "don't go mom. I'll be so scared."

A plan! Yes. I will lay with you, get up, check on you so you know I am there. Then, you will sleep. Consistency is a bitch, I know. However, tonight we had some tears, but fell asleep alone in the bed. Less frustration, more sleep.

Tomorrow may be another night of sitting with my child, rubbing his back, talking about fears and dreaded night anxiety. Compassion, understanding and love. Yes. Love that binds us into a blur of one.

Or, it could be laughter, reading, game playing and secure sleep with both of us caught up in the electricity of love that flows between us.

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